Saying Goodbye

Whenever we create change in our life, it’s likely we have to say goodbye to a number of things to which we have become very attached. At the end of last year, we said goodbye to the flat in England we had grown to love and to everything that went with it — the beautiful countryside and the pleasure we had living in a small English village during each of 9 summers from 2009 until 2018.

Of course, since we were leaving England for good, I had to let go of the car that had served us so well over those summers, but what surprised me was the extent to which I had become attached to it. I never thought I would be attached to a car, but I was.

It was a 12-year-old Mazda that I bought for just 1900 pounds with only 19000 miles on the clock, so it was like a brand-new car. I loved that car, and even though it gave me great pleasure to give it to Caroline, my youngest daughter, I noticed that I was having a hard time letting go of it.

One interesting little fact about that car is that JoAnn is not able to drive a stick shift, so we had to look out for a car that was fully automatic. Only later did we notice that the registration plate read F-J0-2 VWL. (We read it as For Jo, Too.) Just a coincidence, right?

Yesterday we said farewell to the car we both loved – our S-type Jaguar. It was 14 years old and had reached that point where to put more money into keeping it on the road was not the way to go.

Also, with me having terminal cancer I couldn’t imagine leaving JoAnn with a car that needed constant attention and was potentially unsafe. So, we traded it in for a Subaru Crosstrek which is one of the safest cars on the road. Nevertheless, it was hard saying goodbye to that car.

It was interesting observing that about me. The gurus say we shouldn’t have attachments, especially over things like cars.

But what if such things have a particular meaning to us? Does that count? If you have read my book Radical Manifestation, you may recall that this model Jag did have a particular meaning for me.

When I a young adult I perceived that the 1959 Jaguar to which our S-Type harked back was a car for successful people with money. I decided that if I ever owned a Jaguar like that I must have become successful. 

That was a very strong subconscious suggestion I put into my mind at that time. It is clear to me that the attachment had meaning and may well have played a part in my becoming as successful as I did. That’s my story anyway and it will do for now. 

What are you attached to? Is it the ‘thing’ you’re attached to or what it represents? Or, maybe a memory that comes to mind when you see it. How difficult would it be for you to give it up? I’d love to see your answers in the comment section below.



47 thoughts on “Saying Goodbye

  1. Dinny Evans

    Wow Colin such a beautiful post and a great question! I have had my own physical challenges this last year which haven’t really stopped my body from being able and present but having had a couple of “full seizures” and three “partial seizures” I was just told this last Monday that I can’t drive for three months moving forward without any kind of seizure. So in a sense I have been told I have to give up my freedom of the grocery store, to the bank, to work, to visit friends, to the movies! Crazy as it might sound, in many ways I have been handed more freedom than I had before because I have been told I have to give up certain responsibilities to others in order to be sure I take care of myself! Since our conference call with Godfrey I have been restudying Radical Forgiveness and renewing my commitment to Radical Manifestation. I now have the time to keep moving forward with these studies which are personally feeling so expansive. Saying goodbye has offered me the opportunity to say hello to many new beginnings. I love you and JoAnn so much!

    1. Jennifer Fox

      Collin, I read every word you wrote and follow you and obviously, I must say it is a pleasure having learned all I have learned through you. Well I think it is very hard letting go not specifically of things we possess or we have bought and know we will not be able to take with us the day we depart, but letting go of things or places that have made us have special memories is quite difficult. I think the day they sell my parents house will probably for me be the happiest day due to all the problems that have raised because of money issues in the family after Dad died, the memories of all the good times and bad times will never go away, but I do wish the house is sold soon for my mothers mental health, since it is a thing that worries her a lot. It is very important to let go of the house and the lovely times we had their memories of a lifetime over 44 years there. But it will give us all tranquility so the best thing to do is sell it and have everyone get their part especially for Mom who will turn 89 this years. We have to let go of material things I lost my kids father who was 60 November 2017 and now my ex-husband is also with cancer and it seems to be terminal I have been taking care of him, because I considered it what I needed to do and probably a soul contract he is 61 so that makes me think well people sometimes go young so lets enjoy the most of our lives and understand material things can help but that is all.
      Jennifer now 54…

  2. Mike Turner

    imahve lost many things so far thru my life, things that for good or bad reasons I was attached too. in the beginning I was frustrated and angry with the loss, where did i leave it, did some one take it, and it would take a longtime for me to get over it,
    I think it is ok to have things that mean a lot to you. that represent part of your history, important things that happened in your life, be it memories or material things. The not being attached is realizing that all things pass. at one point you didn’t have these memories or things and then you did , and you had it for a while and then you didn’t have it any more. so it is about letting it go. Now if I loose some thing I hope that who ever finds it needs it. it has out lived its purpose with me. I don’t need it anymore, life goes on just like it did before it come into my life. Enjoy it while you can because nothing last forever. even memories fade over time and maybe in the end have no real basis in what really happened but is just how we remember it. all things pass to be born again.

  3. Susan Robinson

    This is a timely post for me, as I am selling my house we raised our family in, grandchildren part of the time, and had my mother-in-law with us in this house. So many memories, and material stuff that we had because we needed it or because our parents no longer needed it. As I de-cluttered it was like going through a time capsule. As I look back at this experience, It’s hard to believe how easily a gave or tossed things away. Keeping my mind on where I’m going, which is my dream to live at the beach, keeps me happy. Your situation is different and I’m not in your shoes. No matter what the future holds, everything is going to be perfect, it’s perfect right now. The ocean can be rough on the surface, yet peaceful and calm below. Thank you for sharing your story, and bringing to the world your wonderful gifts.

  4. Aileen Hoarder

    Colin, will you give your Jaguar to me? That would be a good way to show your un-attachment to unimportant things. My name is Aileen. Thanks,

    1. Maria Gómez

      Dear Collin, it’s amazing how Synchronicity works! I am just dealing with let it go! Doing changes in mi mind the gave me a spur in left toe and a strong flu! I am dealing with letting go my partner, he sheeted me and represents all the partners before and my parents, both abandoned me as a child, and had cheat problems in their relationship, before they got divorced when they were very young! I had been radical.forgiveness sheets of all or them, including my last partners, and right now I am dealing with the acceptance of the fact that my ex doesn’t love me anymore and it’s over! In fact he got a brand new relationship with another pretty and younger woman just at the same time he was abondoning me. I don’t know how many time do it have to pass until I got to the latest point of the sink before I can stand up on my feet and feel that finally I let him go, bless.him.and wish him the best, because he was my master teacher, helping me recognize old patterned and subconscious believes that makes me attract all that emotional pain and awful experiences I had experienced with him finishing the last year! I hope you are getting such well in the circumstances you are dealing with, I wish you serenity, love, calm, and easy going in your process, I send you withe and pink light to your material.body and spiritual being. Blessings! We are all souls, learning something different in our path by this Earth, we are all brothers and sisters!

  5. Emma Bramble

    I am facing similar changes in my life right now. Retiring from my (more than likely) job and moving forward to the unknown. The most I hope for is good health for as long as possible so that I can embrace the wonder of change and all of its challenges. Trepidation, yes! Decisions made due to physical changes, yes! Giving things up that mean quite a lot to me, yes. I hope to gather peace and wisdom and serenity in the coming months. I have enjoyed your blog immensely.

  6. Rich Feight

    Thank you for sharing. A thought popped into my head around (pun) your thought of attachment. It’s not material attachments that they warn against. It’s attachment to the idea that we are bodies. That things are things. They’re not. They’re spirit. And they don’t exist. That’s the big dream. All equally forgivable. No matter the attachment. No matter the error.

    As long as we’re sharing.. I’d LOVE to do you satori breathing. I’m attached to breathing…. I mean breathwork. Hehe

  7. Kelly

    Oh my…I had no idea you are ill, my heart is broken. Having just lost my beloved Maggie dog yesterday, my sole companion in life, seeing your email was divinely guided. I have endured many losses in this life and it never gets easier. Somehow you find a way each time to just do the next right thing. Sending you love and comfort.

  8. Davina

    Thank you, Colin. Your shares are always perfect and timely. I just had to let go of a car I loved for similar reasons after letting go of a home, a marriage, a city, a Community, and my beloved cat all in the past 8 years. This has been a time of letting go. All of my life is different now and I’m learning to make room for the new things coming into my life. A new relationship, my partner’s children, and a new phase of life. Anyway, I know that it’s all good, and I also understand attachment to a beloved car, and all that you’re releasing and I send you love.

  9. Bill Paul, Athens, Georgia.

    Colin…I loved your note about saying ‘good bye.’ Thank you.
    At 84, with advanced COPD issues, I, too, am in the process of also saying “goodbye” to things, places and people I love—including your and your family…but, long ago, my notes to you were received by others and I assuming this one will be received by another as well. I’ve enjoyed knowing you and sharing some experiences with you and others during thee early days of your new career. Thanks much. God’s speed!

  10. Tally

    I’m attached yo my car because it has been wonderful and fits my body like a glove. My last car that in had forb7nyearscwasca lemon and source of constant stress. When it came to an expensive air conditioning repair, like you, I decided enough is enough. I had no feelings trading it in.

    Im getting readybtomgive up,my house and buy a 100 year old one in a small town. Im fixing up mynhouse to sell it and feeling i like it now. Its a 20nyear old house i am the first owner of and it is cheaply finished. The doors rusted, baseboards disintegrated, you name it. Now, with new doors and wood baseboards going in it looks like new. But i dont want to stay. 20 years and its time to have the home of my dreams. This house is the last of my kids directing me what to do. Now im free to do what I want.

    I have old antiques that have been in my family for generations. They represent family ties. But i dont feel as connected to them as i once did. Id gladly give them to my children.

    I have my hopes and dreams. A positive tomorrow. These would be difficult for me to give up. These represent my views towards my life. This would take a complete overhaul to give up and my heart goes out to you Colin.

  11. Bridget

    Hi what I have Noticed in life is the things we attached ourselves to can and possibly often do bring pain and I think now that life is here to reach teach us that we actually do not own anything or anyone or any object I think with all of the detaching I have had to do which caused me great pain to let go of is to teach us that attachments are not healthy and eventually we will all have to detached from our possessions, people,planet, family, friends, houses, cars, our bodies, even breath so that we can return to being spiritual energies and return to being our true selves to return to home 🙂 we never own anything in life it is just borrowed including time.

  12. Linda Boone

    Great question, Colin, and I was surprised by the first thing that popped into my mind: a handmade advent calendar I received probably 40 years ago. Growing up, we did not notice advent nor have such calendars. I was studying the Bible with a woman maybe 15-20 years older than me at the time. “I” was in the role of “teacher” – and maybe I had some insights that were interesting but not life-changing and maybe I had some enthusiasm for my relationship with God that was contagious, but Jono (her real name) was beautiful, quiet in her delivery of everything, and as gentle a spirit as I’ve ever met. We studied together over the course of a couple of months. My husband got to know her high ranking retired officer husband – who could be a bit intimidating – until he cooked for you and waxed on about the beauty of making fly-fishing lures (which he did with great artisrty). I wonder how much more I more might have learned from Jono if I had been quieter. At the end of our time she gave me the most beautiful handmade advent calendar which I hang every year and which reminds me of all things Jono – grace, tenderness, quiet joy, dignity, softness with toughness beneath, love. I can think of passing on the story of it’s part in my life story but I cannot yet think too much of passing it on. But I’m a step closer to letting go.

  13. Paulina Mazurek

    Wooow. … thank you Collin, this message came on the right time to me. Thank you for sharing it today.

  14. Julie

    Thank you Colin for your wonderful work teaching the world about forgiveness, you are leaving a beautiful legacy to be read by present and future generations.

  15. Sydney King

    Really timely for me. I just read a report detailing feedback given to me by my high school students. I had a horrible rating in every category and I’ve gone down dramatically over the past two years. I used to be a favorite teacher of most students and now I’ve lost all that. It has me questioning everything about my career.

  16. Petrina

    I thank you from the bottom of my heart so very very much. You Radical forgiveness has served me in the darkest of times. I’m so grateful for you contribution my life and his world. I wish you well on your journey!! Thank you for teaching us how to live!!! xoxo

  17. Jane

    Hi Colin,
    Just dropping in to reply to your question.
    As a teacher, more than material things, I find it hard to leave my students behind. At the end of each course, when the farewells, parties and hugs are over, there is a sense of sadness because part of me goes with them. Of course my thoughts and heart are filled up again when new students arrive. Perhaps my “consolation” is knowing that I have tried to give them something of value. I have given my best love and I pray that it might do good in their lives.
    God bless,

  18. Stacy

    Giving up my attachment that I will not be receiving the love and attention I longed for as a child by my parents is the hardest attachment to let go of because I was never attached (rooted) in the first place. Although I am attracted to certain cars, houses, clothes I pay attention when I am attached to longing or having a certain object because (for me) it is my signal or hidden belief the certain object will somehow make me more lovable, give me the attention I longed for, or somehow fill the emotional void of not receiving what I needed from my caregivers.

  19. Viki

    Colin…..mine was a 2005 Mercedes Benz sports convertible. I know I had reached my goals when I owned one of those. I loved that car, but I bought it used and on credit and it soon needed repairs after repairs I gave it to my brother that likes to tinker in cars. Now I’m having to say goodby to my job and having to recreate myself. I’m reading extreme self forgiveness cause my financial and work part of my life sucks and is in the gutter. There is no one to blame but me, and I don’t like me at this time so hoping your book will lead me out of this spiral. I really like all of your books. Thank you for your wisdom.

  20. Brenda B.

    Saying goodbye to you is the hardest thing I have to do. Has it not been for your gift of listening to the spirit and being guided through the Holy Spirit I would have never had the healing what happened today and the constant reminder of growth forgiveness and love. I shall always cherish this about the word you and Joanne have put together and help millions of us to see the truth. Having to say goodbye to my parents brother and husband. Thank you for your post and helping us to stay awakened until it’s our journey to go to the other side

  21. Brenda I

    Saying goodbye to you is the hardest thing I have to do. Has it not been for your gift of listening to the spirit and being guided through the Holy Spirit I would have never had the healing what happened today and the constant reminder of growth forgiveness and love. I shall always cherish this about the word you and Joanne have put together and help millions of us to see the truth. Having to say goodbye to my parents brother and husband. Thank you for your post and helping us to stay awakened until it’s our journey to go to the other side

  22. Anne Golden

    Several years ago a driver ran a red light and totaled my car. I was ok but my 12 year old green Audi was totaled. I loved that little car but did not realize how attached I was to that car until it was gone. When I reflected on what else I might be attached to I discovered my biggest fear. That when I reached the end of my life I would look back and discover that I had not fulfilled my purpose, my reason for being here in this lifetime. So I sat with that and focused on how to release that fear. Nine years later I no longer hang onto that fear. Based on my own emotional & spiritual growth, work assignments, and the light that has grown inside of me, that fear no longer grips me. It may lay dormant but has been replaced by gratitude and awareness. You are still one of my beloved teachers and the the weekend workshop I attended in Seattle in 1999 on radical forgiveness changed my work and personal life. Colin, you are good medicine and I count myself among the lucky ones that had my story transformed in the room, with witnesses from heat to light. I continue my journey with gratitude for my experiences and enthusiasm for the future. Forgiveness is the secret sauce.

  23. Marija

    First of all, I love your emails. They are so deep and touching and leave me wondering about lot of things. This question is particularly interesting cause I was already wondering about it. So here it is – I’m currently attached to my relationship, but more about the idea that it carries with it – that I am loved, and safe and finally on my way to make a family as I want it. Like, I’m not alone anymore.. Haven’t read all the previous comments, maybe there are more of you guys writtung the same thing..

  24. Sandra Marchman

    At age 6 when my father died very quickly with no warning, I was allowed to say goodbye to him at his funeral. What I learned was that saying goodbye was forever, and a very sad and sometimes emotionally, financially and physically dangerous thing to do having lived through the outcome of that experience. I was then taught to say “see you soon”; but never embraced any comfort from that because that did not end up being true. Then I learned that after saying goodbye to some things, not all things I loved leaves at the same time and from my understanding of “I am safe” is the truth. Now at 77, and learning about life I understand that saying good bye, opens up once again the truth in place saying “hello again”. It is written that “as we were welcomed by loving hands when we came here, there will surely be loving hands to welcome us back.” and other things to love and make memories with. What a wonderful thing when we learn the coming, leaving circle of possessions, and people we love and life is eternally circling and the memories are the blessings that remain. On this I rest assured.

  25. Jeannie

    When a tree had to be cut down in my yard, I cried and cried as I felt the other trees in my yard were grieving. The tree service man looked at me like I was a kook! We all missed the presence of the big silver maple tree. I was very surprised at how upset I was over this as I never realized how attached I was to my trees, my yard, my plants, my space. I watched my dogs as they adjusted to the loss of their big shade tree from which they used to seek cover on sunny days. As I watched my dogs, I saw how they used the now big tree trunk as a perch. They developed a new game where one would stand atop of the trunk while the others tried to bark or chase them off it. Standing on tree trunk gave them status and they created fun out of it. I saw how they fluidly adapted from using the tree as shade to the using the tree trunk as something positive. That shifted my mindset as well. I now try to see how loss of presence creates opportunity. It is not easy!
    Thank you for helping us learn to not fear!

  26. Dean monroe

    Thanks as usual Colin for asking such soul searching questions. After loosing pretty much everything and whatever wasn’t a total loss and completely “ gone” was destroyed by hurricane Harvey. Everthing in my life and everybody else in the entire world will change and did change for me over night. I’m fortunate to have been introduced to the book Transitions, by William Bridges. The ending comes first, then the transition then new beginnings. The transition is the inner world of moving through and letting go emotionally o things that have changed. I still wrestle with the pictures playing in my head, the uncertainty of what might happen next. Even though the transitions are difficult, they have broadened my reality of just how temporary everything is. I seldom get caught up in chaos and drama anymore. I’m more peaceful most of the time than ever before in my life. It was slimy like a switch turned on a light inside me that said, “ Dean, the answer is, there is no answer.” There’s no guru or simple fix or any one thing that’s gonna fix uncertainty or shit that happens. There’s a lot of answers to lots of things. Life really is uncertain and the only way out is through. So I grateful for my life and everything and everyone in it. It’s all going to be gone and so am I. I just Handel it all differently. Everything is temporary. So enjoy best we can while we are here. Just remember that one hundred percent of the people who eat carrots and going to die. So enjoy the carrots. I’ll see you all on the other side. Right now, I’m going fishing. ????thank you for you life Colin and Jo Ann. Dean

  27. arlette

    Dear Colin,, i loved you mail and all the pertinent questions you asked , and your feelings letting go of your cars,, i think it helps us all to reflect on our own attachements Thank you,, Im a bit younger then you, in the 70’s we re all on the exit path its a question of time, i appreciate so much your humour and uplifting remarks , you’ve brought us all so much with Radical Forgiveness and have left a great mark on our world. i am eternally grateful for your books and courses,i share this information with family and friend, its has brought me a lot of peace,, my blessings and prayers accompany you and Joanna, Namaste Arlette

  28. Marie Brunger

    Hello Colin
    Thanks again for sharing your feelings. I can relate to the things that make us feel successful. I’m 65 years young. Last year I finally let go of my website. Even though it wasn’t working for me it, having a website made me feel successful. It gave me a way of sharing through blogging and I must admit I liked the fact that my name came up many times when surfing the net. Now here I am in the throws of having another built. Yet this time it’s different. I am already accepting I am a success in my own way and in my own right, whether others know it or not. I am sending all sorts of photos off to my web designer to use. They are not professional, very natural shots taken in different walks of life, doing what I love and dressed for the occasion. I hope that when it is finished it will represent who I am rather than what I do. It gives me an opportunity to provide a community service doing what I love. May you and Joanna be blessed with many miracles and ongoing success along the way. Marie

  29. Melitta Manz

    Hello Colin, We haven’t communicated personally before, but if you have time, please read ‘Dying to be Me’ by Anita Moorjani. It may just be inspirational for you at this time. May you find joy and fulfillment in whatever you do. Take care, Melitta

  30. Ann

    Last year I was forced to move out of a house that I loved. I picked it out and met the owners practically the day they put the For Sale sign on their lawn as it was a street I used to take my daughter to school every day. The whole process of finding, purchasing, and moving into the house was easy and fun. That is what I miss. Moving out was difficult in many ways, and extremely unpleasant due to a very nasty buyer and real estate agent.

  31. KG

    Colin, I am always praying that I may grow in detachment! It is so difficult. I am new to your blog and I am looking forward to reading your books, thanks to the referral of a one of our mutual friends! Thank you for sharing your wisdom. And I pray your condition allows you to remain peaceful and centered.

  32. Annina

    Dear Colin, I haven’t seen or spoken to you in about 10 years, but wanted to say hi to you…so I’m doing it now: Hi Colin;)
    I had to give up having a biological child, which was not as hard at first. But now I see, that I do have a little bit of difficulty with it. My husband will be genetically related to our child, but I won’t be. We are also using a surrogate to carry our daughter. She is 19 weeks along. I try to look at the bright side and that we will be able to have a child finally. I’m already so in love with her. In the end I’m really not giving anything up, but having a little one in my arms in hopefully about 5 months from now.
    I admire all you do! Thank you!!!

  33. Carolyn

    Saying goodbye to family and friends is hard
    It seems to be harder if the death is sudden more of a shock I guess. When my parents died of a lingering illness I had time to grieve every day and was able to let them go peacefully
    I wish the same for you Colin thank you for ALL you have done

  34. Karen Jones

    Hi Colin, I feel for you. You are so brave. You are so inspiring. I have had a lot of goodbyes in my life, and it gets harder and harder. Funny, I had a car also which was crashed into. I only had it for a few years and when I had to leave it and take all my stuff out of it at the wreckers, I swear I heard it talking to me, asking me to fix it and reminding me of all the fun times we’d had together! I was also so surprised to have this experience with a car. Odd. 🙂 So I understand how you must’ve felt. 🙂 Cheers, Karen in sunny New Zealand.

  35. Patricia Prior

    I loved your *saying goodbye* remarks. Some time ago I purchased the Radical Forgiveness for Weight Loss course but have not yet done the course. If it is still an option I would like to start doing it now. I am going to be 82 in August and was quite surprised with needing a couple cardiac interventions which had me hospitalized briefly. I’m again right as rain and truly would like to take this course now if possible.
    Thank yoiu
    Patriica Prior

  36. Burrill Catanach

    It is so good to hear from you, albeit the news about letting go of stuff. Yes, I agree that unhappiness is a direct result of attachment of wanting and not wanting. The 17th of this month, I turned 80! I’m realizing that I will soon be letting go of it all. I still want to go out over the top! Some kind of ecstasy.
    You have given so much to the world and to me of course. The “work”.of A Course in Miracles, is Radical Forgiveness and I continue use whatever technique I can to drive that into my very thick skull! I still facilitate weekly ACIM study groups, now at the Center for Spiritual Living. Our minister has asked me about doing a Circle. I hope I may do so with your blessing.
    Am sorry to have lost contact with you. You and JoAnn have a lot on your plates now and I feel a loving light surrounding you on the remainder of your time on this planet. For one who gave so much to so many, I know it isn’t easy to let go. I can’t think of a finer experience than to feel the ‘ give and take’ of clear relationships and to experience the purpose and joy of being a meaningful participant!
    Thank you for the gift you gave me. Love to you both! Burrill Catanach

  37. JJ Pooley

    Colin, how timely your message was to me! One week ago my home was burglarized and the 2 teen boys took my laptop and an external hard drive. I have seen how attached I was to the hundreds of photos, emails, and documents I just lost. (No, I hadn’t backed it up for a long time!!) I immediately started practicing my Radical Forgiveness, realizing I must have entered into a soul contract with these teen ‘angels’, The tools you’ve taught me over the years are invaluable! I love you so much and will ALWAYS treasure what I’ve shared with you. Love and blessings are sent your way.

  38. Anne McDonough

    Colin, I am stunned and deeply saddened to hear of your cancer diagnoses. You can’t possibly remember me but years ago right after reading (no, devouring) your book, Radical Forgiveness, I called you to tell you how much your wisdom meant to my desire to grow as a human being. Understandably, you weren’t available at the time. I think I left you a brief message. At any rate, I was absorbed in a film at a movie theater the next day, when my phone rang. A bit angry about being disturbed in the middle of ‘my movie”, I picked it up anyway. ‘Hi Anne, this is Colin Tipping. How are you?” I almost passed out as I said please hold on while mad dashing out of the theater. When I asked if it was really you, you chuckled and said, why wouldn’t it be? Amazing! We chatted a bit. With much Irish hyperbole, I thanked you again as if you’d dropped down from heaven.Throughout the years I so wanted to attend your seminars, classes here and abroad, because everything you said and wrote felt RIGHT in my heart. Unfortunately, I was never able to financially swing it, but am still devoted to your teachings, which have changed my life. I will never forget you, Colin, and thank you for your love and caring for all beings. Note: Unfortunately, I still unable to forgive and accept my adult son despite years of futile attempts. If possible, would you or your trainers be able to advise me on which of your books I should reread to help me through this unwanted, impossibly difficult state of being. In the meantime, pure love to you.

  39. Agata

    Collin, Wishing you the best from the world ! you gave us so many good knowledge just from God’s soul !

  40. Jane

    The ‘thing’ that is most important to me is my cottage. I have been going to this particular area since I was 7 years old and am now 74. I have heard horror stories about people losing family cottages due to taxes etc so I put my name and those of my three children on title in order to be certain that it is automatically theirs when I pass with no costs owing. One son talked about the other two siblings buying him out. I told him that it was not about him but rather his daughter and her two cousins. He understood. When I pass, my name just drops off the ownership and it is up to my kids to ensure that their kids retain the property. I have also arranged rental of boat slips so that the money realized covers the expenses such as taxes on the cottage and utilities. What a wonderful feeling knowing that the horror stories have been averted.

  41. Vini

    Dear Collin, my personal process has brought me to the point where I have finally realized: I have been running all my life from the fear of death (of my Ego). In love, there is no death, only transformation. Now, having faced my biggest fear (dying – letting go or losing is one possible manifestation of the big picture), I find more light and more love in each single moment. God bless you!

  42. Billie-the-"kid"

    Beautiful post… and all the more so as it seems you are saying goodbye to SO much right now, and paving the way for others too to experience their own goodbyes. I’m noticing most my attitude toward the illusion of youth (MY illusion, you understand. I’m not fooling anyone else with my refusal to act “mature”) Yes, the lines on my face are becoming more and more prominent; and yet, I do want to maintain a youthful attitude toward life. Am I doing great at that? Well, maybe in some ways. I’m beginning more and more to see that experiences are more important to me than “things.” I’m grateful for the memories of experiences I’m no longer able to enjoy (like SCUBA, water skiing, dancing for hours). Thank you for sharing your journey with us and encouraging us to do the same!

  43. Peter

    Dear Colin,
    Thank you for your updates and emails, including this last one “Saying Goodbye”. My spiritual growth started over ten years ago with your book “Radical Forgiveness” which was given to me “for no reason” by a young lady who had strange abilities to sense and read energies even those from a distance. I never told her that, but in my mind I called this woman a “good witch”. Life went on and so did my troubles. To make this short, from multiple readings over the years, other books, and sources, I was able to come out and be in pretty good standing today. I still today make reference to what you wrote in your book. You wrote that each of us is a “spiritual being having spiritual experience in human body”. And, this is the reason for which I am writing this. I believe that your illness might be an opportunity of possibility of discovering something that you haven’t found yet. This comes from that voice inside and somewhat from my mind that says that I am resisting saying good bye to you. You’ve been one of my best teachers for years. Instead of saying good bye
    So long Colin!

  44. Sandra Culter

    I am attached to my clothes. For many years I have been overweight and I refused to give up the clothes that didn’t fit. I had clothes in my closet from size 8/10 to 18! I knew someday I would get into them. I am finally ridding my body of excess fat and getting into the clothes. Oddly enough, once they become too large, I don’t mind letting them go, but need to wear them first. $ issue? Just want to wear them first? Enjoy them for awhile?
    Love you and your work!??

  45. Kathryn Morgan

    Wow, lots of comments! Sorry for the delay, but this is an excerpt from something I wrote about a year ago. Thank you, Colin; I can relate! “Many people get attached to the vehicle they drive, though I never thought I would. Nonattachment is one aspect of Buddhism which I have found natural, and so I was surprised to recognize my strong attachment to my car when it died suddenly in January. I was fortunate to be able to borrow a car and take my time deciding what to do. Ultimately I chose to trade in my car for a brand new one, which was an amazingly emotional process! I had no idea the emotion tied up with my vehicle, until I realized what it represented. That car was, sadly, the best aspect of my life for many of my years with it, as it carried me through the most difficult period of my life. Purchased brand new as a gift to myself, a first time buyer, after four years of not having a vehicle at all, it was the most nurturing and luxurious yet solid and practical aspect of my life then, and my only asset. To me it represented safety, peace, and freedom, values which I panicked were being wrenched away from me when it died. Once I was resolved to trade it in, rather ceremoniously I cleaned out the car, witnessing with some alarm my tears! I slowly realized that the car’s death meant I am truly, finally beyond those hard times. It’s all behind me now, and I can really let it go. By letting go of my car, I was releasing old energies, coping strategies, and ways of being that no longer serve me. …”

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